The Way It Was

As "car folk", we tend to reminisce about the "old days", when things were simpler, and presumably better. But lately there are certain things that strike me as having become terribly wrong.

When I was growing up, every boy in school was fighting over what few jobs were available. We were always ready and willing to work our tails off for a nickle. But nowadays it is nearly impossible to find a young man who is willing to work, and when he does, it is begrudgingly, and the work is done in a sloppy manner. No longer is there any pride in accomplishment, or a job well done.

And growing up, a person could play harmless pranks on one another, and when caught, would likely be scolded, then everyone had a good laugh. Now, if a person plays a prank, he is sued, or tossed in jail. There seems to be little tolerance for pranks anymore.

When we wanted a bicycle, we would build it out of parts scavenged from all over town. Now a kid won't be caught dead with anything less than a brand new high-end bike. Ask a boy today to build a bike, and he would not know where to begin.

As a youngster, I could spend an entire summer entertaining myself. Exploring, baseball, fishing, skimming stones...Today, if you take a child's computer, game cube or cell phone away, they are lost and bored. They cannot entertain themselves - they must be entertained.

And I look at all the angry, lost kids. And I wonder if it would be different if they, like us, had been forced to be active, inquisitive, athletic, and a builder of dreams, and not just a dreamer. Would they be less angry if they were more independent, and more secure and confident in their abilities? Would they be less lost if they knew how to take something apart and put it together again - and make it work?

Perhaps it is our fault. In our quest to provide a better life for our kids than we had, we tend to deprive them of the fun, education and confidence that comes from the school of hard knocks. We tend to forget that we got where we are because of those hard times, not in spite of them. We are strong, and we are builders and doers. We have accomplished much. And we owe that to what we learned along the way.

What are today's kids learning along the way? They know which stores in the mall have all the latest electronic gadgets and games, and which have the latest fashions. They know how to text message, but cannot carry on a face-to-face conversation.

In our quest to give them something better, I wonder if we have, in essence, taken away the best, and replaced it with shallow nothingness.

I am glad that I did not do everything I could have done for my child. I'm glad that I made her earn everything she got. I am happy that she was encouraged to be independent at an early age. I am glad that I did not rob her of the very lessons we wish they did not have to learn, but they must.

And I am so very touched when she looks at me and says, "Thanks Dad, for letting me figure it out and do it myself."

I hope she remembers - and gives her own children the same gift of strength and confidence.